Hey ***gots, I'm a Dragoon, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are bearded, staff-wielding, no-lifes who spend every second of their day casting spells. You are everything bad in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever jumped higher than 3 feet? I mean, I guess it's fun making people turn into frogs, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than jerking off to dancers in inns.
Don't be a stranger. Just hit me with your best skill. I'm pretty much perfect. I was captain of the party, and can't be hit once I do my high-jump. What sports do you play, other than "jack off to half-naked pixellated japanese dancers"? I also get flawless victories, and have a banging hot mature caller (She just Sylph-healed me; Shit was SO cash).
You are all mages who should just cast Death on yourselves. Thanks for listening.