The REAL guide to perfect grammar
Let me give you the rundown. First is Mr. Capital Letter. He may seem imposing, but he's really friendly once you get to know him. Mr. Capital Letter is the final form of Mr. Lowercase Letter, and he can be transformed by holding the "shift" key before you type him! He goes at the beginning of sentences, because he is the beginning of all good messages.
Miss Comma goes after a phrase. She's pretty nice too, so long as you don't overuse her. When Miss Comma comes into a sentence, she gives the reader cues on when they can breathe. Assuming they're reading aloud (freaks), this can come in very handy.
Proper Spelling is a dashing young gentleman who loves to be part of your sentences. When you use him, not only will he be happy, everyone else will be too. Why is this? Your sentences become coherent, that's why!
Correct Grammar is also pretty cool. She's hip, trendy, and oh-so-fashionable for today's sentence writers. In a sentence, Correct Grammar makes sense of your jumbled pile of words. She puts subjects before nouns, apostrophes in the right place, and makes certain words look right. Miss Grammar knows sometimes you mis-type and enter "there" instead of "they're". Don't worry though, she's here to help.
Finally, Captain Punctuation. The Captain is a commanding man, for sure, but he just wants you to make the most of what you type. Captain Punctuation's special job is to end your sentences right. If you're asking a question, he'll put in a question mark for you! Assuming you're making a statement, he's always right there with the period you need. What if you're surprised or excited? There's an exclamation mark with your name on it.
What's really amazing though? When these five unassuming parts of speech come together, they form the mighty lexical juggernaut, WELL-FORMED SENTENCE!!! Even better though, is that they want to be YOUR friends! Get to know them, okay?
your mom has a chanceಠ_ಠ