Chuck Norris /invades
CHUCK NORRIS IS SO TOUGH....
Chuck Norris ordered a big mac at burger king and got one.
Chuck norris doesn't need a watch he just decides what time it is"
There is no such thing as evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live."
When Chuck Norris jumps into water, he doesn't get wet. Water gets Chuck Norris."
When Chuck Norris went to the Virgin Islands and came back, it was just called the Islands."
Chuck Norris doesn't read. He stares at the book and the book gives him information."
Chuck Norris owns the greatest poker face of all-time. It helped him win the 1983 world series of poker despite him holding just a joker, a 2 of clubs, a 7 of spades, and a green number 4 from Uno and a monopoly 'get out of jail free' card.
Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
Chuck Norris doesn't kill two birds with one stone.....he kills two stones with one bird
Chuck Norris was born in a cabin he built with his own hands.
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding
There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.
you know chuck norris was originialy supost to go to hairoeshiema
but the atomic bomb was more humain.
Chuck norris lost his virginity before his dad.
When chuck norris walks into a room... He does'nt turn the light on, he turns the darkness off...
Chuck Norris is so manly that he went through puberty while he was still in his mother's womb.
Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
A snake once bit Chuck. After five days of extreme pain... The snake died.
Chuck Norris knows the meaning of every word in the dictionary - except mercy.
chuck norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun!
I heard that Chuck Norris is so tough, under his beard, there isn't a chin, only another fist.
If you want a list of Chuck Norris' enemies, just check the extinct species list.
When Chuck Norris washed his hair with Herbal Essences, the shampoo had an orgasm!!
Actually Chuck Noris Died 10 years ago, but the Grim Reaper doesn't have the courage to tell him.
Blizzard had a hard time when Chuck Norris decided to try World of Warcraft. Everytime his Level 1 human warrior attacked a monster, it would RoundHouse kick it, disintegrating instantly, killing everyone in a two billion yard radius, and crashing the entire server a second later.
Chuck Norris doesn't bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint.
chuck norris can touch MC hammer
chuck norris can slam a revolving door
the "black eyed peas" were just called "the peas" until they met chuck norris
Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and kick himself in the head.
Chuck Norris' blood type is WD-40
Chuck Norris has counted to infinity. TWICE.
"Chuck Norris was originally cast as the main character in 24, but was replaced by the producers when he managed to kill every terrorist and save the day in 12 minutes and 37 seconds."
When chuck norris was a kid he used to fry ants with a magnifying glass...at night
chuck norris started a toilet paper company, it fail cuz it didnt take crap from anybody
Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.
If chuck norris had been in the movie "300", the movie would be called "1".
The quickest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris' fist.
According to Einstein's theory of relativity, Chuck Norris can actually roundhouse kick you yesterday.