I can see it now, Kim camps out for the new iPhone for 4 months and 30 days, eating Tactical Bacon all the while... and has a heart attack and has to be put in the hospital on the day before it actually comes out, thus wasting 5 months of effort.
The best canned bacon we've ever tasted. Really, this stuff is so delicious it's scary. It has a 10 plus year shelf life and is as tasty in year one as it is in year ten. Perfect for stocking up so you can survive the pending zombie invasion.
With that shelf life, if you buy a few truckloads you won't have to go shopping for bacon for years!