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03-05-2011   #1 (permalink)
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Default Trust.

I'm sorry if you think I'm abusing these parts of the forums, but my emotional stance is on the verge of a break down.

You see, I have a lot of online friends I trust with my life. And they have no problems on meeting me. (They're all friends in real life)

Now, what if I shouldn't trust them? What if they're all laughing at me behind my back and thinking I'm so stupid and etc. What if I'm just that noob who L33T speaks and asks for money to them. What if they hate me? D:
What if they tell each other all my secrets that I don't want to be spread?@_@

Now, you might say I'm just overanalyzing, but I can't help it. D:

Even in real life, I feel like everyone is mad at me. Like I did something @_@, and I wouldn't want that to happen so I become so paranoid and annoying that I keep on asking them. :l
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03-05-2011   #2 (permalink)
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I know how you feel. No, really.

But as you probably realize yourself, there's no way to find out for sure whether you can trust them or not. Your only options are to either continue trusting them and risk being stabbed in your back or become a complete shut-in with no close relationships.

... Okay, that's a bit extreme, but you know what I mean. You can't completely avoid being laughed at behind your back or being betrayed without shunning all people. You could also consider visiting a therapist of sorts, if you feel this overanalyzing and being paranoid is becoming a huge burden in your life. A theraphist could help you finding out why you feel like everyone is mad at you. Or you could try figuring it our yourself. But I can imagine that would be difficult.

That's all I can think of, sorry if it's not very helpful :<
 
03-05-2011   #3 (permalink)
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To know the answer to your question is this:

If you someone did the same to you, how would you treat them the same way as your friends would? Because friends are a reflection of you.
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03-06-2011   #4 (permalink)
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You can never really trust anybody, end of story (this includes even family members). Get backstabbed enough times and you'll realize the simple fact that mostly everybody just looks out for themselves.

You can have friends and have a good time with them, but never make life-long plans or let them borrow things you treasure. People will eventually go their own way, whether it benefits you or not. Enjoy the ride, but don't expect much or that it'll last forever.
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06-07-2011   #5 (permalink)
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I know how you feel... That's how i feel... Ive told my deep secret's to people. When i do i feel closer, but for the ones im really afraid to lose i don't even though they may understand. As for you, are you're friends the type to be trustful Alot? Most ive learned is that you can tell... depending on the realtionshio and there type of personality etc.
Ive shared alot of myself to people...
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06-09-2011   #6 (permalink)
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I understand what you're saying, but this is all part of life. You want to trust because you want to be accepted, but you can't help but distrust at the same time. And people do and will back stab. It's a risk you have to take when making friends; a risk you have to take with anything.

I say just enjoy the time you're having with them now. If anything bad happens, it happens (not saying it will). You just have to move on and try to learn to trust again. If you don't trust at all (Like what was implied earlier by Vith), then how can you expect it back?

You'll find someone (or some people) that you will be able to trust -if not completely- then almost completely, and you'll be happy.

Don't give up! :]
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06-09-2011   #7 (permalink)
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I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but trust is one of those fickle concepts that, as a result of the evil inherent in human nature, can never truly be developed. Frankly, I project myself as a warm, friendly guy whom you can trust, but rarely will I ever tell friends or even family members secrets of my own. Always maintain a healthy dose of cynicism, 'cause humans are the most vile creatures on this earth--both in literature and in real life.

That said, I do encourage you not to be so preoccupied with what others think of you; if they really don't like you, you'll find out all too soon. Remember what Dr. Seuss said: "Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." Moreover, it's important to be frugal in revealing your life to others and to take care that you don't, as Urban Dictionary phrases it, blow your thought wad. When people feel like they know everything about you, which often can be the case if you tell them too much about your life, they lose interest and, in turn, gain irritation. Believe me--I have a friend who tells me about everything that goes on in her life, and while her stories captivated me and made me feel special at first, the act grows old when it repeats endlessly. Please don't follow in her footsteps.

To sum up, don't worry about what your friends may or may not think of you and just content yourself with who you are. It's okay to share your secrets with those close to you, but try to keep some to yourself; no one is completely trustworthy or capable of absorbing too many stories without some ugly means of regurgitation.
 
06-11-2011   #8 (permalink)
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One word: Chill

Hope I helped. (:

Try to not over think it. If you can't trust your own friends with personal secrets, then don't share them.
 

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