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02-09-2012   #1 (permalink)
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Well this piqued my interest. So I watched it. And now I have some comments and stuff on it. And I think you guys will too. So it's sharing time, YAAAAAAAY!

The big question is, was what he did justified?

I think they both had some screws loose, and I can't say I fully support or reject what he did.

For starters, the daughter appeared kinda spoiled. Wanting all those things. And complained about some insignificant chores. And wanting to be PAID for these. Come on. But hey, some of the complaints are valid. Tracking dirt into your home, then asking your daughter to clean up after you? What? WHAT? You want them to act mature and disciplined, when you do shit like that?

For the things like shoveling the fertilizer, and making the coffee... The stuff like making coffee, I can see being ok once in a while. The fertilizer stuff, it better be once in a blue moon, or you're also helping with the fertilizer. It's unclear whether she does enough chores to be tired by 10 is true or not, so...I'll leave that alone.

Then "when I was your age" speech ticked me off.
Quote:
When I was your age, I moved out of the house, lived on my own, went to college while in high school, worked two jobs, worked as a volunteer fireman, and still went to school.
Really, both scenerios that explain this makes him look stupid.

A) What he said was true. I don't know how it was back then, but I don't see how you can live on your own now. Your parents could not care and not say anything if you left I suppose, and you could somehow find someone that'd be willing to let you pay rent for an apartment room or something...Could be different back then. And going to college while in high school...what? Again, has to be different from now.

In this case, things are different now, and back then. What people did back then doesn't happen now. Shitty high horse speech.

B) He's exaggerating or lying. Uhm...yeah. Still shitty high horse speech.

They appear to want to push her to getting a job a lot. She's 15 and...I think it's pretty silly to expect someone MUST have a job at 15 in this day and age. If you got one, hey, good for you. But I wouldn't say they MUST have one until they're 18 (and not in post-secondary). 16-18, you can definitely nudge them to get one.

She seemed pretty spoiled, so I think she sorta deserved what happened. But at the same time, I think she doesn't, cause she had some valid complaints.
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02-09-2012   #2 (permalink)
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He might've been exaggerating it a bit, who knows. I have no problems with what he did, but again, that's just me. I guess it's sorta an equal punishment, "humiliate me online, and I will do the same" sorta deal, and yeah, she did it, twice. The chores that she mentioned she has to do and that he addressed don't seem so backbreaking hard and the time she goes to sleep and wake up... eh, I can see why she is grumpy, but some people can survive with a minimum of even six hours of sleep. Although, that all depends on the person.

Some families have a cut-off age for responsibility (getting a job to earn money for your own things), and that age is usually 15-16. I know first-hand from my boyfriend's family. Also, there's a guy in my college psychology class who is still in high school, although he is home-schooled so I don't know what to say about that. Yeah, I realize these are some sucky examples, but eh, I'm not one to argue. Times have obviously changed ofc, there are a lot more factors in living on your own now compared to back then, I suppose anyways.
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02-09-2012   #3 (permalink)
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It may have been pretty extreme... but the only loss is a perfectly good laptop and an embarrassment for disrespecting your parents. (And maybe some emotional scarring...)

I had a father who was incredibly hardworking too, so I guess I kind of 'side' with him. It's hard to see his side of things. Sure, times are different now but that doesn't mean he didn't try his hardest and had a difficult time when he was younger. He's not asking her to move out, go to college while doing highschool or well, what he did aside from the job.
He only wants her to get a job because SHE wants things. 15 is not an unusual age to get a job these days anyway so it's not like it's something out of the ordinary.

I ask my mom to make me tea, and asks me to make her tea. Same thing as coffee. What's the big deal? My mom feeds me and makes certain foods if I request so why not do the same?
As for shovelling fertilizer, that is pretty gross, but it seems like they have a farm or ranch or something. I grew up around farms and a lot of my friends helped out and there weren't big complaints. A farm or ranch is huge and this dad I guess has two jobs. He's tired too from working so he can pay for her upgrades.

What he did was a bit extreme but I can't imagine how hurt he must feel from his daughter.

Right, so here's a personal story as to why I don't think he's bragging and that even though the times are different, hard work was still hard work.
When my dad was really young, around 9 years old, his parents passed away and he lived with a mean uncle (who would hit him and his siblings). He didn't have shoes and from what he told me, the skin on his feet were so hard that he could walk on glass and had to do so often. He didn't go to school because he was too poor, but was able to get into tailoring which eventually escalated to him moving to Canada from China. He had a lot of hardships, especially since he didn't know any English, but he was able to eventually own a clothing story and was pretty successful. Forever in his life, he was frugal. He always saved money for his family and never indulged in himself. He made a lot of sacrifices and I am incredibly grateful. I used to not respect my parents until I smartened up and realized that my parents have done amazing things and my mom continues to do so. I still get annoyed at her, but I need to remind myself of all the things she's done for me.


Even though I don't think her dad was bragging, I think he was trying to get her to see how lucky she is and respect him a little. He tried to make a better life than what he had.
Her message was basically, "**** the things you did. I don't care. Why should I work hard?"

Edit: Sorry, I got a bit emotional. |:

Editedit:
But in the point of view of a teen, I can understand that she wants her own free time and do the things that she wants to do. Writing that note to her parents and showing it on a public place is incredibly disrespectful. If anything, she should have wrote it in a diary that only she could see. It seems like her dad treats her well, and posting that on facebook makes him seem like a bad guy. A lot of the chores are pretty trivial though, but then again, in a teens eyes...
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Last edited by Yume; 02-09-2012 at 11:56 PM.
 
02-10-2012   #4 (permalink)
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I can kind of see where he's coming from. Both my parents worked really hard to be where there are now, and I know it. My dad is second generation Polish and he had 5 siblings and his parents were still "new" to America. He had very except his own family to rely on. He knew he couldn't go to college so after he graduated High School he went to vocational school post-grad to be an electrician and he was valedictorian for that. He works over 50 hours a week right now so my family can make ends meet.

He had jobs ever since he was 16 (again, different back then) and was always working hard. Kids these day are truly blessed to have what they have, and we really honestly should (for the most part, not every case) give back.

Both my parents currently work at least 50 hours a week (my mom at least twice a month) and put a roof over my brother and I's heads. All they ask in return is that we help out around the house. My dad more or less put it like this:

"We are a team, we are the only family we will have and we will always have each other. What team would we be if we didn't work together for tomorrow? Besides school, is it so much to maybe ask for 20-40 minutes of your life a few days a week for chores? And it's even easier than what I had"

I don't even understand why every teen needs a laptop now - I didn't get a laptop until College, and that was a graduation present. Then I saved up to buy myself a better one and gave mine to my mom. It sounds like the dad bends over backwards to take care of her computer as well (how teenagers these days manage to be morons when it comes to computer maintenance is beyond me) and she didn't even respect that. The internet she used to post that disrespectful post? Honey, your parents pay for that.


It may have been really harsh, and I almost still want to side with the dad. Fight fire with fire? It may not have been the best course of action, but if occasionally taking a few minutes out of your day here and there is too hard... I don't even know.
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02-10-2012   #5 (permalink)
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I was personally cheering throughout the entire video.

I probably would've done the same thing if I was him. That doesn't fly well with me, typing up some long, ridiculous rant about your parents making you do chores when you're not even an adult yet. Seriously, grow up.

I'll be honest, though. I wasn't raised in some tough childhood like the father was. I had plenty of chores to do everyday, and when I was still a kid I would cry and whine about them. But they still got done and I never got pissed off afterwards. I knew that I had to because it was the right thing to do. My parents would ask me to vacuum, do the dishes, help with the gardening (shoveling and wheeling around fertilizer, helping dig the holes, etc.). I'd do my share of the work, then I'd be off my merry way. But I still did it out of respect for my parents since they've done so much for me.

As far as the whole laptop issue goes, she should be damn grateful that her dad would go all-out on fixing up her laptop for her. All I get from them for my laptop are Anti-Virus software renewals (because they're really finicky about that stuff). Everything else I have on/for my laptop I bought with my own money.

I'm 19 going on 20 this year, and yeah my parents still give me money. But that's not to say that I'm out working as much as I can so I don't have to keep asking them for money. Before I left off for college, they already had a solid financial plan for me to get me through college. My dad is a Navy veteran and has the G.I. Bill that pays for tuition if I attend a college within California. Then they've had a good load of money saved up since I was born to help pay for the cost of housing and books. So I'm pretty damn grateful that they've done all that work and sacrificed so much for me. I sure as hell know that I'm eternally thankful for what they have done.

And we joke about it sometimes, too, whenever I get a chance to be with my parents. They jokingly tell me about the (second) condo they want me to buy for them, the cars I'll give them, the jewelry and fancy clothes they'll get as presents from me every Christmas. Yeah, I laugh at it right now, but it makes me more than want to work hard so I can buy all these things for them. They've helped and spoiled me a bit while raising me, so why not I help and spoil them a bit when they retire?
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Last edited by kuyaBaka; 02-10-2012 at 11:29 AM.
 
02-10-2012   #6 (permalink)
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Quote:
I don't even understand why every teen needs a laptop now - I didn't get a laptop until College, and that was a graduation present. Then I saved up to buy myself a better one and gave mine to my mom. It sounds like the dad bends over backwards to take care of her computer as well (how teenagers these days manage to be morons when it comes to computer maintenance is beyond me) and she didn't even respect that. The internet she used to post that disrespectful post? Honey, your parents pay for that.
I don't get it either. I don't see why having a laptop, ipod, ipad, iphone, smartphone, and whatever else is a MUST in your teens, barring 18 and 19. I went without anything till 17 with a laptop and a smartphone (The only reason I got them too was cause I got a job, and I was studying computer science). And just about everyone else had at least a smartphone while I was 15~. The only justification for the phone I can think of is if they had jobs, which very few had. As time progresses though, they'll probably become mandatory like having a home computer, due to technological advances and etc.

Quote:
I'm 19 going on 20 this year, and yeah my parents still give me money. But that's not to say that I'm out working as much as I can so I don't have to keep asking them for money. Before I left off for college, they already had a solid financial plan for me to get me through college. My dad is a Navy veteran and has the G.I. Bill that pays for tuition if I attend a college within California. Then they've had a good load of money saved up since I was born to help pay for the cost of housing and books. So I'm pretty damn grateful that they've done all that work and sacrificed so much for me. I sure as hell know that I'm eternally thankful for what they have done.
Part of the different time and age I was talking about. College/uni tuition is nearly impossible for students to pay now, unless you got a cheap one to study in. I have a friend who's studying to be a doctor, he's not in a prestigious school or anything, but his tuition is 70K! I know, cause he's studying to be a doctor, but even still, half of that is still mind blowing. I don't care how much you worked in highschool, you're not getting that money. A friend that worked while in highschool for 2 or 3 years had only 12K~.

Moving out is even worse. How the shit are you gonna afford even rent? At minimum wage, I was only making about 1.2K a month, FULL TIME. Let's say you pick up a better job somehow, and make 2K a month. Great, half of that goes towards rent. Now factor in gas, food, etc. etc...Even if you can make it pass that, how will you pay for your post-secondary education?
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Last edited by RoflKnife; 02-10-2012 at 01:03 PM.
 

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