We lost one

Amidst the tragedy of the typhoons that ravaged our country, a stray dog that I've adopted just a little over a month ago gave birth to 7 adorable puppies. She doesn't have a name yet and neither does the puppies. But adding that to my beloved Nuri, that makes 8 dogs that I'm caring for~ Just this morning when I checked up on them, some of the puppies have opened their eyes for the first time. It was just too precious for words~

But tonight when I went to check on them again, I saw 6 of the puppies huddled in one side of the wall, and 1 lying on the far corner. I thought it was nothing at first but when I went over and touched it, it didn't move. I got worried and picked it up. It was dead. I'm not the emotional type in real life and I never cry at anything. But this one just broke my heart.

It was a female puppy. She was healthy when I left this morning. She had good weight so it's not malnutrition. There were no wounds or anything. But one thing I noticed was her hind legs. One was bent like a normal puppy leg, but the other one was straight as if it had no joints. Maybe it was a genetic deformity, I dunno...

I buried her under a tree on the empty lot on the other side of the street. I made sure that her mother didn't follow. When she saw the poor thing she just kept nudging and licking her. When I walked away and shut the gate behind me she was whining non-stop. She was restless the whole night until I calmed her down by sitting next to her puppies and she fell asleep next to us.

I think a part of me died too. I'm really sleepy but my eyes won't close. I'm trying to comfort myself in the fact that the remaining 6 puppies doesn't have any deformities. I'm just praying that we won't lose another one.

I'm really tired, but I can't fall asleep....