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Entry #7: The Best Diet Plan Ever

Posted 12-31-2009 at 09:12 PM by BeanMarine
For those of you who are dying (bwa ha ha, I made a pun) to look like a walking skeleton or always believed that you were meant to be a stick rather than a fleshed-out humanbeing... look no further, because I HAVE THE PERFECT DIET FOR YOU.


It's called removing your all four of your wisdom teeth. And it sucks.


If it wasn't obvious enough, I would like to mention, as a side note, that teeth extraction is not really a diet plan. I actually don't recommend it at all, because you really need your teeth to like... chew stuff, unless you're like a spider that enjoys sucking on guts through your victim's rectum.

Just yesterday I got all four of my wisdom teeth removed. They were fully grown, had already developed their nerve endings, and were basically making themselves right at home in the corners of my mouth. I should have gotten them out sooner; my dentist told me a year earlier that I should remove them... but I tend to put education before my own health, and, before I knew it, a whole year had gone by and my wisdom teeth--now big and healthy--were just beginning to bother me.

So I scheduled to get them removed. I actually opted to just receive a local anesthetic, because (1) I wanted to be awake to observe the whole procedure and (2) my boyfriend was uncomfortable with me being unconscious while a male orthodontist hovered over my face.

I gotta say that the experience was a bit traumatizing. Maybe it's just my mind blowing things right out of proportion, but watching them dive into my mouth with all their metal tools and drills really dove into the archives of all the horror films I've ever seen and sent my twisted imagination on a high. Not to mention that, although I couldn't feel any pain, I could definitely feel the pushing and the tugging going on in my oral cavities.

But I'm better now. I was prescribed some vicodin for pain relief, and I'm trying my best to not use it too often. I don't want to end up as a sarcastic, medical genius like Dr. House, and I definitely don't want to be constipated. The pain hasn't been too bad, though, the worst part is

NOT BEING ABLE TO EAT ANYTHING.

Yeah, that's right. For the past two days I've been eating Rice Porridge, pudding and jello. Rather than risk having my wounds become infected, I've resorted to eating liquidy foods that don't put too much stress on my stitches.

But oh, mah damn is it hard to not nibble on a cracker or some solid sustenance. It's especially hard when your mom is an awesome cook and always leaves the kitchen smelling like heaven. Just today she was making some delicious ham and some sweet smelling corn-bread and all I could do was continue sipping at my unsatisfying rice porridge.

On the bright side of this awful predicament, I've lost some weight. Well, I've been losing weight ever since coming home (staying up late gaming tends to do that). My pants are getting lose, and I'm looking forward to shopping for some new ones 8D

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Comments

  1. BriGuy92's Avatar
    Ohh, that sounds very terrible for you. I haven't had any teeth removed myself (actually, according to my dentist I will never even get wisdom teeth. Weird, huh?) but I know exactly what you mean about getting freaked out about the drills and things. I get extremely scared whenever I have to get a cavity filled. Sure, I can't feel anything, but knowing that there is, at any given moment, a drill or a giant needle or what have you sticking into my mouth is, shall we say, a bit disconcerting.
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    Posted 12-31-2009 at 09:43 PM by BriGuy92 BriGuy92 is offline
  2. kuyaBaka's Avatar
    Aw, lol. I read about getting your wisdom teeth pulled on your Facebook. At least that horrifying experience is over and you won't have to face anything like that again (hopefully).

    Eating jello and porridge isn't that bad. I mean, sure, they can be bland at times, but you'll have this entire period of time to experiment and play around with how you can make it taste better. Think of it like a handicapped adventure! 8D

    (Also, buying new jeans right now is a plus since many a store shoot up sales around now. At least, I think it's around now?)
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    Posted 01-01-2010 at 02:39 AM by kuyaBaka kuyaBaka is online now
  3. 7979789Omina's Avatar
    Awww that sucks, I had mine removed last summer.

    I also hated the experience, though not as much because I was knocked out. After the thing was over and I get stuff back, I said the ABCs with Gnaws in my mouth and when my mom asked what I was doing, I assumable said "I'm preparing a speech!". Though eating soft food for a while bugged me... though experimentation like Kuya said helped the experience feel like an adventure.
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    Posted 01-01-2010 at 10:48 AM by 7979789Omina 7979789Omina is offline
  4. PedroRomero's Avatar
    but you might gain it back once u start eating again...

    i actually really love porridge, pudding, and oatmeal yummy! maybe you'll also love it by the end of this ordeal
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    Posted 01-02-2010 at 01:37 AM by PedroRomero PedroRomero is offline
  5. BeanMarine's Avatar
    I like porridge when it has an assortment of organ meat to eat on the side, but rice porridge itself is so bland. Bleh :x It also leaves me hungry within a couple of hours, too--it's like the porridge passes right through me!

    LOL, yep, I'm taking my chances with liquidy foods and experimenting. My boyfriend is going to make one of his protein shakes for me. He says it tastes good, but I've never been a fan of banana shakes. Bananas were meant to be eaten raw! RAWR.

    Oh, yes! I managed to snag some cheap pants ($19.99) at Aerop@o$lteax (I don't know how to spell it ;_; ). Was really tempted to buy more, but my current finances strictly admonished me--so I put the other two pairs of jeans down /cry.
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    Posted 01-04-2010 at 07:38 PM by BeanMarine BeanMarine is offline
 
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