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02-21-2013   #51 (permalink)
SlowBro
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Let's put an end to this once and for all shall we?
You probably saw the movie 40 year old virgin and thought it was hilarious how that man lived with his nerdy lifestyle and sexless life. It was a movie about that guy's rise from the decadent, boring life into an exciting, sex full and normal life, right? Wrong. Think about it.
The titular 40 year old virgin started his day with a little exercise, made his breakfast and rode his bike to work. When he got to work we saw that he didn't have the best job in the world, and probably not the best pay either, but he liked it, he liked his job, and had enough money to buy all the shit he wanted.
After work, he rode his bike home, greeted his friendly neighbors and spent his night playing videogames, watching movies, painting figures and building models, in other words, he did whatever the **** he wanted.
Now this is where it gets tricky, he went out with his co-workers and let slip the fact that he was a virgin. They immediately start making fun of him, which makes him feel bad about his virginity. Remember, he never once felt bad about it, he was living a happy existence, peer pressure was the only reason why he even thought about it.
Suddenly he is going to nightclubs, he's drinking, talking to women and does he feel happy about it? No, he feels awkward, but he can't stay a virgin right? That's just silly.

After a few failed attempts, he finally meets a women that seems to like him, gives him her number, they go out a few times and eventually, she's ready to have sex but ups, her teenage daughter walks in on them. This is an important part, because now you realize that this women has 3 children, a man in his early 20's who doesn't live with her, so that's ok, a teenage girl and a young boy. Suddenly, the poor 40 year old virgin finds that he has to take care of 2 obnoxious kids, but that's not enough.
The women finally sees the virgin's apartment, and marvels at his action figures. She immediately says "hey, let's sell this kiddy shit", the virgin doesn't want to sell it, he likes having all that shit, but is pressured buy the women anyway, because HER little store is going to sell the toys, so more profit for her. Remember, this women is supposed to be miss right, the nice, mature women that you should marry.
The guy finally snaps because he realizes how much his lifestyle changed, but it's too late now, after a couple of high jinks he asks her to marry him and he eventually has sex.
In conclusion, the poor bastard left his happy carefree life and is left with a women who doesn't like his nerdy shit and two kids who aren't his but he has to raise anyway. His free time his gone, his money his gone, his toys are gone and his independence is gone, but that's ok, at least he had sex.
And that's why I don't have a girlfriend, because to me, the 40 year old virgin is a tale of a man who descended into darkness.